“The Mask”

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It’s so scary to reveal our true selves. Showing what lies within, showing the scars that we hide. Sharing the pain. Afraid of being judged. But this mask, or sometime even masks’. Who are we truly hiding from? Our friends? Our family? Ourselves? God? What a truly difficult question to answer. There can be so many reasons for us to even wear a mask to begin with, but they all come down to one ultimate reason. Trying to conceal who we really are. Have you ever put on a front? Everything is ok… I’m good thanks, how are you?… God will work it out, I know that… You have a blessed day… I love you. Have you ever spoken words like that and it’s not really what you wanted to say. It’s not what you really felt inside. We all do. Some of us are just trying to be polite, some of us are afraid to reveal how we truly feel. Why? Why can’t we be honest, especially with our friends, our family, ourselves and most importantly, our God? That’s the real question; do we think our mask can hide us from God? Adam and Eve tried to conceal themselves, thinking He can’t see us, or even know what we know. Is this the real reason we do this? Do we put on a mask to pretend for our God? Did Christ ever put on a mask? When he was hanging on the cross, did he say “I’m ok, God will handle this, and God bless you!” and smile? Trying to hide what he truly felt. I am not claiming equality with Christ, but if he is our example then why can’t we be honest. Why can we not say, I’m hurting today. I don’t feel ok, I know God has this. Maybe even I’m not sure God has this and I just want to cry myself to sleep and wake up to a new day, in hopes it will be better. Why can’t we be honest like this with God? If He is truly with us, then why do we pretend He doesn’t know? If we can just hold on and get past this, it will be ok. It will go away. Sometimes we even wear the mask of pain. I know I am guilty of this myself. I want people to know I’m hurting in hopes they will stay clear. This mask shows as anger. If we are mean enough people will never know the fear, the hurt inside. Channeling this pain in a way to distance ourselves from those around us. Why is it we cannot be naked and exposed in front of Him? It’s not like God doesn’t already know. It’s not like we won’t one day stand before the throne. Is this why we do it in the first place? I can tell you I will be humbled at that day. Why is I won’t let myself be humbled now? Why do I think If I pretend long enough and get past this place, it will all be forgotten? It won’t. It is forgiven if I reach out to God and ask forgiveness, but sometimes the pain and consequences remain. Why pretend it doesn’t? Stand in God’s presence right now and remove this mask. Now, this very moment, He is alive and waiting with open arms. How much easier to remove this mask and say Lord here am I. This is what I have done. Removing the other mask that can be there, shame. Does it change the past? No, but it is freeing to say Father this is what I have done. Father I can’t do this any longer. Father I don’t know if I want to. Instead we put on our mask, pretending it will all go away. Maybe if we walk far enough, run fast enough, stay in the shadows of shame it will go away. Perhaps if we try to hide in the crowd, blend in. Put on a new mask, just like everyone else, pretending. Why would I ever want to do this? Carry this mask, which can be so heavy. God tell me please. I have been some of these places and am still guilty of it now. I truly pray that before he returns and I am in one of these places, that I have revealed myself to Him already. Talked to Him about it already, instead of just waiting for that moment, trying to put it off every day. Is that what we think, that if we hide long enough maybe God will forget? We won’t have to face him and just slip in Heaven’s gate? Is that what I have done, put a mask on Him? A big old scary God mask? Instead of seeing Him fully exposed in front of us. Hanging there for all to see. Why can’t we go by Christ’s example and if we want to wear a mask at home. Fine. At work. Fine. But take one of them off. The one with which we try to conceal ourselves from him. Take that one off in front of him. Instead of trying to hide in the crowd, pretend that mask will work. Adam and Eve did it. They stood in front of Him, trying to hide, conceal themselves. I can even imagine they had their arms in front of them. How ridiculous a notion to think He couldn’t see them or didn’t know what was really going on. I am so tired of hiding, walking way, running. Burdened by these masks, pretending everything is ok. There aren’t any struggles. There isn’t any pain. It’s time to take off the mask.

God bless you,

Steadfast

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